I Tested J.Crew's New Giant Fit Chinos

Here's what you need to know about these behemoth pants and other Haute Garbaggio™ in this week's newsletter.

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J.CREW’s Giant Fit Chinos—Worth The Hype?

For the last few weeks, the menswear internet has been big buzzing about Babenzien’s New J.Crew™, who of course is the big homie behind Noah and formerly Supreme. I’ve bought a few things from the new fall drop and frankly, it’s been a joy to once again shop at the store that first made me fall in love with the idea of putting on new clothes and feeling cool. Back then, the idea of wearing chinos, desert boots, and peacoat felt like high fashion. (it was 2007 and I was a junior in high school.) After years of exploring everything the world of #menswear and the deep, dark corners of Dover Street Market has to offer, it feels good to be back.

So anyway, J.Crew dropped some giant fit chinos that harken back to the brands 90s roots aka the pants you got as handmedowns from your big brother and/or the pants you were issued for private school if your parents didn’t trust the public pipeline in your town. (Congrats on the wealth, king!) To be clear, J.Crew most certainly sold this fit like 3-4 years ago (and I even remember them from my high school days) but no one gave a shit about them then, which if nothing more is a sign of good marketing.

Point is, unlike before, I actually was compelled to go to the store in Soho and try them on to report back to you, dear reader, about what you could be (literally) getting yourself into with these.

The Fit

As advertised, the fit is WIDE. Like, wider than you think by seeing the beautiful male model in the lookbook in ‘em. When J.Crew says giant, they are NOT bullshitting. So whatever you’re expecting from them, I highly recommend trying on a pair before pulling the trigger.

Length wise, I’d say they’re around a 32-33” inseam. In my case, that means I’d definitely have to get them tailored.

Waist wise, they’re a bit big. I’m a 34 in most pants and was kind of shimmying around in that size, so I’d probably go with a 33.

Quality

People will tell you that you can find vintage dockers for 1/10 the price on eBay, and that’s true, but I have to say these J.Crew pants feel hefty, dense…like a serious pair of pants should. I can’t speak to long term quality but out of the box you feel like you’re getting your money’s worth.

The Look

I honestly can’t tell if they’re something I’d wear regularly or if my eye just needs time to adjust, being so shocked at just how big they really are. I have shorter, wider legs, and really wide pants can make me look even stumpier.

Some people have hated on the ones with the boats on ‘em, but they’re really not that wild. I do have to admit I prefer the plain version, but if you wanna pick up a pair without waiting, don’t feel like a goober buying the ones that have a little extra something.

The Big Stepper Sleepers

By the way, I’m kind of obsessed with these lowtop hiking boots right now from J.Crew. Hiking Boot stock is a BIG BUY on Jim Cramer and these look like a pair you can actually rock on the daily because the worst part of wearing hiking boots is lacing and unlacing them. These, by nature, are probably half the work. These people over at the Crew really gotta pay me for all this free game but in the meantime, another reason to ask for your support by paying for a subscription to this newsletter!

$248, available at jcrew.com

TikTok, Ego, and Service

On a more serious note, I had a realization in the last couple of weeks that I’ve been going so crazy on TikTok (volume, the amount of time I spend thinking about it) that I kind of lost myself to it. The best way I can describe it is I basically made the algorithm my everything (or as people in 12 step programs like me call it, my Higher Power and/or God). A video does well, racking up likes and new followers, and I feel self worth…some perverse sense of “love” or affection. A video bricks—which it did horribly about a week ago, doing like 200 views in an hour compared to my normal 5,000—and I feel like shit. (In fact, I kind of had a panic attack about it.) This isn’t exactly the ideal version of spiritual sobriety I aspire to, but I’m grateful for this moment of clarity. TikTok is a fucking drug, and as someone who loves drugs so much I can’t ever do them, I have to remain aware of keeping my ego in check when it comes to a dopamine-inducing virtual existence.

Since then, my views have gone back up—some weird glitch in the app might have gotten fixed or something—but that doesn’t mean shit in terms of who I am as a person and my value to the world. I’m writing that to remind myself. I’m at my best when living selflessly and in service to others versus fanning my ego, and am grateful to have tools to help me recognize when I’ve veered way off course from that primary objective.

I don’t know what this means in terms of my posting schedule on TikTok (posting less and putting more into each post certainly feels better over the last week, so I’ll probably keep doing that), but I’m just saying all of this as words of encouragement to anyone out there who’s ever felt like social media has their emotional health in a fucking vice grip. (And by the way, if you’re someone struggling with addiction, hit me up! I don’t know much, but I do know where to find some good answers that have helped me.) The best advice I can give to someone feeling like the walls are closing in and they’re juicing every avenue of external validation to escape feelings of worthlessness? Call someone in need, help them out, and get out of your own head. For me, the best thing I can do for myself is simply stop thinking about myself.

I think it means I’ll be spending more time over here writing because it’s a venue where I can say all of the above without thinking about making it *engaging* or cramming it into the most distilled, highly potent 60 second version of itself. By the way, thanks for reading.